Signs of the End of the Empire

What do you see when you spot a little red wagon like the one in the photo, a Radio Flyer that has stood up over the years and pulled many a kid through many a yard?

What, you see a burden, a load too hard to pull? A barge too heavy to tote? Bring on the Razor, the electric wagon (junior) like the one I spotted outside Lewis Drug today. Why is it better?

Here's your answer:

Add a boost to your kids' traditional wagon ride with the Razor Jr. electric wagon. Perfect for walks in the neighborhood with your kids in tow the wagon is equipped with dual 30-watt motors that cruise at up to 3 miles per hour--an ideal cruising speed while on a stroll. The long-lasting batteries meanwhile keep the wagon running for up to 90 minutes at a stretch. And thanks to the pair of built-in seats and the blow-molded plastic wheels the wagon is comfortable and smooth throughout.

In other words, you don't really have to PULL the wagon. Keep the batteries charged up and it will follow you. Just don't get crazy and try to walk four miles per hour. Somebody save us.

In a related story, the NY Times reports that new military recruits are bigger lard buckets than ever.