Walter in His Dancing Slippers

Walter isn't all that bright, and he's getting a little old, so when he dances at the door expecting to get out to do his business, he's probably thinking he'll bolt for the yard, race along the fence, and sprinkle half a dozen spots on his top ten list. But when it's 10 below and he steps from the house onto a giant frozen planet, his ambition goes out the window and he'd just as soon piss where he stands. So he needs a little coaxing. It's nice to have the sprinkling done a few feet from the back door.

So, as part of that effort Walter was gifted some dandy slippers, which he first tried outside tonight. Ahem. He must have thought he'd been velcro-ed to the floor. The wife carried him to the back door, where, with some coaxing, he tried using them for ski boots. Once his ordeal was over, he did manage to get back to the house under his own power, looking something like a miniature Clydesdale the way he carefully (but quickly--it's 0 out now) lifted each foot.

The wife asked whether I'd like it if I would have appreciated it if someone had put me in shoes after having been without them all my life. Well, I told her, that's exactly what did happen to me. It's been some time ago, but I hope I took to it better than W did.